Your Mom Sucks
Okay, your mom doesn't suck. I just needed to get your attention.
This blog post is about parenting and how to raise children.
Because this is a huge problem, one you’ll have to address if you’re not selfish and plan to raise amazing kids. Or, maybe this could just be a half-baked rant about how my parents raised me. You decide.
Let’s get straight into it. Most parents don't raise good kids, and you know why? Because they lack planning, research, and foresight. I went down this rabbit hole after reading "Rich Dad Poor Dad." Yeah, that cringe finance book everyone talks about – don’t read it for actual financial advice. But I’ll admit, it did make me start thinking seriously about parenting over the years. It turns out, parenting is one of those things where most people just wing it. They don't plan, and they definitely don’t research until the baby’s practically crowning.
Some folks say parenting is hard. You hear people who just had kids telling their friends, "Oh my god, don't do it, it’s a nightmare." Bullshit. Having kids is the best thing you can do, and I hope I have that opportunity one day. But here’s where the issue lies: most people suck at it because they wait until they're about to have kids or already have them before even considering how to be a good parent. Imagine trying to run a marathon without ever having taken a single step in preparation. Yeah, you’d fail. Miserably.
Having kids should be an ultimate life goal
If you don't want to pass down what you’ve built – the lessons, the legacy – to someone, then what’s the point? It’s like creating the best damn sandcastle only to watch the tide wash it away because you didn’t bother to find a way to protect it.
The way to successfully raise kids is to prepare. That’s not just some cliché Pinterest quote; it's the truth. Preparation means understanding that your child isn’t just a mini-you. They’re their own person, with their own mind, emotions, and experiences. I debated this with a girl in a hot tub earlier this year and she claimed that kids naturally hide things from their parents and that can't really be prevented. I mostly disagree.
I grew up hiding literally everything from my parents. Why? Because they treated me like an employee, not like we were on the same team. They weren’t interested in explaining the "why" behind their rules; they just barked orders, expecting obedience without question. And, look, I get it. Most parents have good intentions. They want the best for their kids. But they need to realize, like every entrepreneur, that they don’t know everything. There’s a ton they don’t even know they don’t know. And that’s a huge problem.
YOU NEED TO RESEARCH
If you’re serious about parenting – like really serious, not just playing pretend – you have to study the hell out of it. I want to reference Patrick Bet-David here. The guy has some solid principles on raising kids. Here is one of those videos:
TLDR: He dives into the complexities of parenting, highlighting stuff most parents either overlook or just fail at entirely.
To sum up some of his best points without giving away the entire video, he emphasizes the need for one-on-one communication, allowing your kids to face challenges, teaching them through debates rather than orders, and being intentional about the kind of media they consume. That last one? Crucial. You can’t expect your kid to grow up with values if you’re letting Netflix or TikTok be their primary babysitter.
Talk the Talk but Can’t Walk the Walk
And that brings me to my next point: parents who talk the talk but can’t walk the walk. We all had that moment growing up where we asked, "Why am I learning this in school?" only to be met with the classic “Because you need to.” Wow, thanks for the deep insight, mom. Parents need to be transparent. They should communicate the "why" behind the rules. You don’t have to be your kid’s best friend, but you should treat them with enough respect to explain things instead of resorting to “Because I said so.”
There’s a fine line between being your kid’s boss and their buddy. Most parents mess this up by treating their child like a lifelong intern – never allowing them to step up, learn, and eventually replace them. You’re the CEO of your family. Your kid? They’re the executive in training. Groom them, guide them, but don’t micromanage them to the point where they’d rather lie and deceive you just to feel an ounce of independence.
DO THIS
Here’s a unique suggestion inspired by Mr. Beast that I actually did myself: make a video of yourself talking to your future kids and leave it unlisted or hidden. Mr. Beast recorded a video reflecting on himself and left it hidden for five years before making it public on YouTube. When I watched it, it was heartwarming and raw, showcasing where he was at the beginning of his journey.
I took that idea and made a video as a young adult, and I plan to give it to my kids on their 18th birthday. It’s a snapshot of who I was, what I believed in, and the dreams I had for myself and them. I suggest every parent do this. It gives your kids perspective – a chance to see you for who you were when you were younger, and it’s something they can look back on to understand that you truly wanted them in your life. Because let’s be real, there will be times when they think you hate them, or that you’re not on the same team. Arguments happen. And sometimes, that video can be the bridge to help them see that you’ve always been on their side.
Don't BLAME Schools for Your Failures
A lot of parents are quick to blame schools for failing their kids, like when there were riots in my city over schools not disclosing if kids were gay. Look, if you’re one of those parents who’s furious at the school because you think they’re “making your kid gay” or whatever other nonsense you’re clinging to, let me break it to you: that’s on you, not the school.
If you want your kids to think critically, to understand themselves and the world around them, that’s your job to instill. Schools can only do so much. The real work starts at home. Kids need to be taught to question, to think for themselves, and to understand not just their own perspective but the perspectives of others. Understand why the "enemy" is the enemy. I believe no one inherently thinks they’re the villain; everyone justifies their actions in some way. Knowing why someone else thinks bad is good is essential to raising a well-rounded, empathetic human being.
Communicate Like They’re Replacing You
Your kid isn’t an extension of you. They’re their own person, with the potential to be even better than you if you let them. But they’ll only reach that potential if you communicate with them like a fellow human, not a subordinate. Share the mistakes you’ve made, the lessons you’ve learned, and the struggles you faced. Stop acting like a flawless dictator. Let them see that you’re just figuring this out too.
At the end of the day, parenting is about passing down everything you’ve learned, good and bad, to the next generation. It's about setting them up to succeed where you failed and giving them the tools to tackle life with confidence and clarity. The ultimate failure as a parent isn't letting your kid down – it's giving up on them or losing faith in their ability to succeed. Be real, be honest, and most importantly, be prepared. That’s how you’ll raise amazing kids who, one day, might not even need to read this blog post because they’ll already know what’s up.
Final Thoughts
If you want to do this parenting thing right, start researching now, long before there’s a baby on the way. Figure out who you want to have a kid with. Figure out what kid of kid you both want to raise. Then have that kid. Seriously, it's worth your time. Start thinking about what kind of parent you want to be and how you’re going to prepare your future kid to be the best damn version of themselves. After all, they’re the ones who’ll be taking over when you’re gone, and the last thing you want is for them to be picking up the pieces of your failures.
